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From tech-sol.net, this is an actual job application someone submitted at a fast-food establishment........

 

NAME: Greg Bullish

 

DESIRED POSITION: Reclining. Ha ha. But seriously, whatever's available. If I was in a position to be picky, I wouldn't be applying here in the first place.

 

DESIRED SALARY: $185,000 a year plus stock options and a Michael Ovitz style severance package. If that's not possible, make an offer and we can haggle.

 

EDUCATION: Yes.

 

LAST POSITION HELD: Target for middle-management hostility.

 

SALARY: Less than I'm worth.

 

MOST NOTABLE ACHIEVEMENT: My incredible collection of stolen pens and post-it notes.

 

REASON FOR LEAVING: It sucked.

 

HOURS AVAILABLE TO WORK: Any.

 

PREFERRED HOURS: 1:30-3:30 p.m., Monday, Tuesday, and Thursday.

 

DO YOU HAVE ANY SPECIAL SKILLS?: Yes, but they're better suited to a more intimate environment.

 

MAY WE CONTACT YOUR CURRENT EMPLOYER?: If I had one, would I be here?

 

DO YOU HAVE ANY PHYSICAL CONDITIONS THAT WOULD PROHIBIT YOU FROM LIFTING UP TO 50 LBS?: Of what?

 

DO YOU HAVE A CAR?: I think the more appropriate question here would be "Do you have a car that runs?"

 

HAVE YOU RECEIVED ANY SPECIAL AWARDS OR RECOGNITION?: I may already be a winner of the Publishers Clearinghouse Sweepstakes.

 

DO YOU SMOKE?: Only when set on fire.

 

WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE DOING IN FIVE YEARS?: Living in Bimini with a fabulously wealthy supermodel who thinks I'm the greatest thing since sliced bread. Actually, I'd like to be doing that now.

 

DO YOU CERTIFY THAT THE ABOVE IS TRUE AND COMPLETE TO THE BEST OF YOUR KNOWLEDGE?: No, but I dare you to prove otherwise.

 

SIGN HERE: Scorpio with Libra rising.

 

an2.gifAnd Happy Anniversary to mjkst27, who joined our illustrious community one year ago today! :)

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For my 1000th post since joining Capitalstool (not quite 4 months ago -- I never let having nothing to say stop me from posting), I would like to thank Doc and all the Stoolies for their generosity in sharing their knowledge, charts, strategies, and humor. No names are named so that no one is accidentally left out --but you all know who you are. All kidding aside, may the higher power of your choice or the collective good acts of humanity, whichever is your belief, help us, our friends and families, our civilization and all of humanity in whatever may lie ahead.

 

And in honor of Gladiator who rises early every morning to start this thread, here's the kidding:

 

How To Keep A Healthy Level Of Insanity

 

1. At lunch time, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and point a

hair dryer at passing cars. See if they slow down.

 

2. Page yourself over the intercom. Don't disguise your voice.

 

3. Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries

with that.

 

4. Put your garbage can on your desk and label it "in"

 

5. Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks. Once everyone has

gotten over their caffeine addictions, switch to espresso.

 

6. In the memo field of all your checks, write "for sexual favors".

 

7. Finish all your sentences with "in accordance with the prophecy."

 

8. Dont use any punctuation marks

 

9. As often as possible, skip rather than walk.

 

10. Ask people what sex they are. Laugh hysterically after they

answer.

 

11. Specify that your drive-through order is "to go".

 

12. Sing along at the opera.

 

13. Go to a poetry recital and ask why the poems don't rhyme.

 

14. Put mosquito netting around your work area. Play a tape of jungle

sounds all day.

 

15. Five days in advance, tell your friends you can't attend their

party because you're not in the mood.

 

16. Have your coworkers address you by your wrestling name, Rock

Hard Kim.

 

17. When the money comes out the ATM, scream "I won!", "I won!" "3rd

time this week!!!!!"

 

18. When leaving the zoo, start running towards the parking lot,

yelling "run for your lives, they're loose!!"

 

19. Tell your children over dinner. "due to the economy, we are going

to have to let one of you go."

 

And the final way to keep a healthy level of insanity.......

 

20. Send this as an e-mail to everyone in your address book, even if they

already sent it to you or asked you not to send them stuff like this.

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Good Morning and good stool to all!

 

Drano, that was good. :lol: :lol: :lol: Yours too Glad.

 

But please don't email it to me. :P

 

Your Stoolwethers are posted. Very interesting charts. Surprise surprise, they all point down. I am disappointed that so few of you subscribers follow the stoolwethers. There have been some obviously great shorts in these charts over the years. Now looks like shooting fish in a barrel.

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Futures are rallying off the lows overnight. 9points off the lows in the s&P The dax is 50 points up off the lows.

 

sp futurs traded 836, i think that was a target for many.

 

Can anyone see where the qqq's are in overnight trade? Island.com doesnt seem to have them

 

wondering if SG's initial target was reached overnight and we are bouncing higher

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SG dings

 

For those who didnt see my chart last night, and didnt read my many warnings of the imminent wave 3 reversal on IDS yesterday... may I refresh you this morning with last nights LOB thread chart that I personally put together for my fellow stoolies.

 

Say hello to sub 24 on the Q's, and 22.63 coming next 1-2 weeks. I expect 23.70 by Friday close if not prior.... Im still 200% short

post-3-1043846343_thumb.gif

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Last nights Briefing.com wrap

 

Top Stories

Stocks rally ahead of Bush speech on Iraq, economy

Tue 4:24pm ET - CBS MarketWatch

Stocks rallied Tuesday as investors threw caution into the wind ahead of President Bush's State of the Union speech, with upbeat earnings from Merck and Procter & Gamble and better-than-expected confidence numbers fueling a broad-based rally.

 

E wave interpretation

 

Stocks rallied on a C leg of a wave 2 corrective move upward. Stocks will reverse quickly after the short term sentiment is reversed on a mini wave 3 down towards Simple Guys 22.63 level.

 

The better than expected consumer confidence figure eh? 1/2 of 1 tick better? And sub-80?? Oh yeah, thats a good sign.

 

SG will again reiterate, the news has nothing to do with the markets moves. It's what mood is the public is willing to accept that news. Elliott waves trace out the trend shifts in short term and long term social moods.

 

From a trading perspective, the short term social moods can be traded profitably. The Media simply tries to explain market action based on news... but its not relevant at all.

 

Today, if my mini wave 3 is correct (which it is), then the social mood short term will turn decidely negative and will lead to a swift reversal.

 

The fed pumping money into the system does nothing to change the social mood at all, this is why it only works temporarily and is useless... so stop focusing on the Feed so much.

 

The Put to Call is helpful as it can display SHORT TERM social mood, but to smooth it out use the 21 day moving average instead.

 

We shall see if we reverse today, Im sure the Fed will try to hold it up, but my guess is the weight will bring her down.

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I quote myself from Monday morning IDS at 750am

 

That said... SG says the Dec lows to be tested this morning, perhaps 24.39 even... and then a move to near 25.... followed by sub 24 and on to my 23.31 cited area (possibly lower) thereafter.

 

Dover sole? No such thing in a 3rd wave, only mild short term bounces to be shorted... if you are not short yet, may I suggest you get short on any bounce and stay short for a few weeks...

 

No changes... heh heh

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